"HOLLYWOOD"... IS NOT YOUR NEW BFF!

Exodus: Gods and Kings, and who better to play Moses, than Batman, ughh, I mean Christian Slater. This is gonna Rock!.....ughhhh, I hope…..ughhhh….I pray? Hollywood is my new BFF! I never thought we would be friends. Me, we, us being Christians whoever thought Hollywood, the Great, would chum up to us Christians. I thought we were the prude, the losers, the brainwashed, I’m so glad all that changed and we can now be friends. No doubt, Hollywood wants to be our new BF, Hollywood wants or at least our lunch money, the question is…do we want them? “Of course dummy”, you say.  I say, why not continue to have our own produce our own movies. It has worked up until now, why ruin it? Those Baptist guys, what’s their names, make some great movies, ie: Flywheel, Fire Proof, Courage & Facing the Giants. Kudos to Pure Flix Productions for putting together, “God’s not Dead”.  How about Cloud Ten, producing the original Left Behind with no big actors in it (sorry Kirk, didn't mean to offend)  and yet was a great success.  Look at what a flop “Left Behind” was that was produced by Hollywood, even with Nicolas Cage (who says you have to be glamorous to be in Hollywood), it was a flop, coasting $16 million to make with a meager return of $11 million. Call me and I will write you a check for the $5 million dollar loss if you will just go away before you try making another movie. Again, “God’s Not Dead” a hit and then right on the heels of that Hollywood comes up with “Noah” , a flop, even with the Gladiator what’s his face guy.  That’s right, it was a flop, at least in Christendom. And now, brace yourself, Hollyweird is getting ready to sucker us into another movie, Exodus: Gods and Kings. I was quite proud of the somewhat, boycott, you could say, of the last Hollywood movie, Left Behind. This was not a Christian Film in any sense and I know of very few people that saw it and don’t know of one Church that showed the movie in their church (if you showed it I do apologize for you to our brethren and on don’t tell anyone!). So what went wrong with Nicolas Cage’s Left Behind? You left out any resemblance of Christianity from your movie. Salvation sure wasn't a theme, neither was Jesus or the Anti-Christ or even the Rapture for that matter, it could have just as well been the aliens that took the people from the plane. Unfortunately, we are not only Christians (and this may come as a surprise to Hollywood) we are also human and suckers for entertainment (okay, this part is not a surprise to Hollywood, thence this blog). If we can get a movie without nudity, sex scenes and profanity, we are in!! Finally a movie we can watch with the family, get the popcorn ready!!! But often it leaves us feeling like we were just had by the school bully. We knew all along he didn’t like us, he just wanted my lunch money. What were those, alien monster rocks in Noah anyway? I’m not a theologian but I never quite got that when I read the story of Noah in my bible, maybe I should have read the message translation, after all, it is approved by Bono himself, what more do you need??? I also never knew that a villain snuck on to the ark and almost killed Noah, did you? That’s preety cool stuff, way to keep that from us Lord, you always keep the good stuff from us. But Hollyweird was there to dig deep and get the truths out from the Word.  One more, forgive me, but I’m just an ignoramus, because I also, never knew, that Noah wanted to kill his first grandchild, I always thought he was “pro-life” …I know we, the fundamentalist, loony, Christian right are, so I assume Noah was Pro-Life? There is just so much we can learn when Hollywood takes over. We learned so much about our Lord and Savior in Jesus Christ Superstar, how could we ever doubt Hollyweird again?  I’m interested to see how Exodus does at the theatres and whether we give it a thumbs up or thumbs down. Let me know, cause I won’t be there! If enough religiously themed movies take a loss then Hollyweird will quite making them and go back to “Sex in the City”. They get much more pleasure out of making those anyways. Making Christian movies must be like eating spinach for them, lets be honest. Then what do we do? Well, we continue to make our own movies and continue to support our own producers…..and if that fails? Then we will have to go back to actually spending quality time with our families, in lieu of just vegetating in front of a T.V. or movie screen and calling it “good family time”, either way, we win!  And last but not least, don’t for a second think that Hollywood is your new BFF, he/she (not sure what she is, maybe transgender[sorry, didn’t mean to offend….okay..maybe I did) all Hollywood wants is your lunch money, that’s it and once your lunch money is gone, or you don’t have anymore or have decided not to give it, you will find yourself, once again on enemy turf, the off scouring of all her jokes; being mocked in every movie they can think of! So don’t sell yourself short, Hollywood is not your new BFF.